What happens when that little flame inside you starts to flicker like a candle fighting it's way through a breeze? That moment when everything almost dies but tries so hard to stay ablaze. It's like my head when there's not enough oxygen for me to mentally focus, like a fog after a few shots when all you do is act on instincts and lack of a better judgment. Are you going to stay and fight or are you going flea for cover? Sometimes what's easy isn't always what's right. I don't even know anymore the difference between the two. I go with my gut and follow my heart and hope they've got enough sense to not steer me wrong. I want what everyone else wants...unicorns and pots of gold at the end of every rainbow and maybe an in-ground pool, why is that so much to ask? I want to lift heavy again and love without the fear of getting hurt. I want to stand for something worth standing for and fight till it gives me a reason to just give up. These dragons are everywhere and they don't give up. I put them out with their drink but they keep coming back. Give up and go home? Wake up from this bad dream? Or take a deep breath and get the oxygen pumping again. I'm an athlete, a natural born champion. Giving up has never been in my blood and fight has always been patiently waiting on the back burner for his big debut. I want to win again. I want to walk in a room and pull tricks out of their seats with my openers! I want to make PRs feel light again and hit your lifts for doubles. I want my fight to stay, I like it. It's the only thing that makes me feel alive when everything else starts to feel so dead. I won't ever give up on what's worth fighting for and when I do I'll just make my bed and lie down in it. That little flame inside me will always burn bright, like a hot coal refusing to be taken over by the wind. I'm just now burning red, three shades before that deep blue heat. I'll keep you warm if you want to stay close but if not I'm going to keep fighting this damn fight. Are you with me or against me? What do you have worth fighting for?

The bar.

The bar  It seemed to feel so perfect in my hands today. My feet, although stubborn at first started to move a little quicker, hitting their right places at the right time. Spreading and landing at a better distance apart, ugh I hate that part! Move your feet! How is that so hard? How does someone go from jumping 2 ft forward to not moving at all? It's little stuff right but the decider between the best and second place. No one wants to be second place, I don't.  The gym was more packed today. School is a little closer to being in session and all the overachievers have showed up a little early. I met new teammates and it's starting to feel a little better walking on to the platforms at Lindenwood. Some of them are a little too quiet though, it makes me nervous.  Support. That's all it takes. And belief. Those two things and you can conquer anything. Knowing someone, whoever that is, has your back when you fall is such a courageous feeling. It allows you to pick that bar back up when you lose it behind and just do it again without worry that it's going to be another fail. Or just get through life in general. Change. It sucks. A feeling of starting all over again. Change this, keep that....will it ever feel natural again? I hope so. I believe it will. I can't wait till it does. So much going on and all I want is comfort again so I can find my peace. The clutter in my head makes me nauseous. It makes me think and when I think sometimes I doesn't make sense.... Kind of like this blog. I'm not sure what sense is anymore. Maybe one day it will all come back to me. Until then I'm going to just ride this wave and see where it takes me. Thanks for the vent....I hope it helped someone out there.

When is Enough ever ENOUGH?

Inspired by Mike Cook:

At what point do you call it quits? What is the deciding factor between setting the bar one kilo higher or stuffing it back into the quiet, dusty confines of your closet? When do you know you're done, maxed, at full potential, spent, or just finally burnt out?

I personally don't know the answers to any of these questions. I wish I did.....or maybe I'm glad I don't? As an athlete, I push till I fall over, till I can't get up anymore, till every last tear has been shed or sweated from my body. But as  a champion, I NEVER QUIT! Where is the fine line in which the end lies?

Almost a year into this sport and challenges still hit me everyday. Challenges from PR's, from lack of motivation, from fear.....wait!.... from fear of not getting better (that's more like it) challenges simply because I still see a long road ahead and gas is very expensive.  I keep adding weight though. Even if it's not a PR, I add weight to doubles...somewhere throughout this all it breaks down to a victory, right? I fight the bar and the bar fights back. Good days are fewer than the bad but when a great day comes it fuels me long enough to fight till the next one. Doubt will fill your mind but you have to shut it out. It will encircle your head like a wreath like jolly old St. Nick's smoke from his pipe on Christmas Eve. Tell it to go elsewhere. Fight. Send it over the hill to the more weak souls. The ones who still get shoved in adult lockers because they have no MOXIE! Fight some more. If this were easy every one would do it and then "Champion" would be just another term for "couch potato" or "lazy bum".

I don't know what the end looks like? I assume it's just like dying.....for me it will be. I don't know who I'd be without some version of athlete tacked behind my name? Am I anything at that point? Mother-of-athlete/s (I hope). Faintly I see my end but not because I have doubt. Not because I'm giving up or giving in. More so, because I have "life". I know where I want my road to go and I'm going to try like hell until I run out of gravel or hit the dirt! Until then I will set goals, break goals, and take the bar higher. I will cuss, grunt, and slam bars until I feel better about what lies at my feet. I will take a  victory when it comes my way and except failure only when it makes me stronger.

You? I don't know you. I don't know your moxie. I don't know your locker or your closet. I don't know why you cry or how far you can be pushed before you just GIVE UP! You do though. What are you? Are you a CHAMPION or are you just some other Joe Schmoe working to just keep up and "fit in" amongst a crowd of zombies? You know your fight, your self worth, your pride....what are you going to do with it? Be satisfied with a 1 kilo PR or add more f-ing weight and go till you collapse?? What are you going to make of today so tomorrow you can look back and smile?

Figure it out yet????
Good.
GO!

 

Happy Now...

The bombs have been dropped. The smoke has all cleared. Everyone is still alive each feeling their own emotions. What a relief. Can this all be over now? I wave my white flag. Truce. I shake your hand and smile. You were happy and I am happy now. No one wins in the end, but I do feel a little better now. Scars will stay because they are deserved and I'm sorry if the shoe doesn't fit as well on the other foot. The bitterness is gone from my mouth and all I taste is the sweet remnants of cherry chapstick. I walk a little taller, smile a little brighter, and can laugh again at life. Let bygones be bygones and move on knowing everyone each got what they deserved. I hate this part. You were once my best friend. I'm letting go now....moving on to what makes me happy again. You stay on your side of town and I'll make a new home over here. Keep your head up, someday this will all be a good story. Fight through your pain like I've fought through mine. I'm still rooting for you even though you're on the other team. Go on, do big things, thank me later for the fire I just built in your belly because I'm thanking you now for the one in mine. This will all be over soon. Close your eyes really really hard, get mad, and grit your teeth a little.....those lights you still see, well, that's ME. I made it through the darkness, I know you can too.

Tarnished Trophy

I sit here awake in bed. My thoughts are like 20/20 vision in the dark and my visions are like a kid with ADHD. Light weights today, tomorrow heavy again. Happy one second and ready to rip faces off dragons the next. I close my eyes only to see what it is my mind keeps thinking. I like it though. I like the world in my head. I like it so much I just want to sleep but I can't....this world makes my heart race. It plays in high definition with the volume on max. A ticking time bomb inside my chest.....pushed to the limit everyday, just waiting for you to make that call and for everything to blow up.

The humidity makes me sweat. You make me sick. Jayden wakes up in the middle of the night calling for "mama". I roll over and pet her back to sleep. Training is hard but it's not my only test of strength. I want more. I want it all. I want to make it big while I watch you hurt in that rearview mirror.

Wrap your knees for these pistols skank, you're going to need every bit of help you can get. Come here, I'll give you a hug! Watch me as I knock out reps without stopping and use your max weights in my warm up. CrossFit SchmossFit, you can't beat me, but you can have this....It's not my best trophy, I brought the best one with me.  Sit it up on your table and watch it closely cause in enough time someone else will run off with it again. Tempting on the outside made of priceless gold but on the in, lies and deception. Too bad the tarnish will never rub off and it's left stained forever.

Blog after blog I've deleted lately because my zombie fingers take over and try to get even. I pull back even though it feels so good. I save them because they've actually been some of my finer pieces of work. I read them as inspiration for myself and I laugh knowing you're such a fool. I know what's important and I have it. Fearless and confident everything else will come. I'll put my fight to better use now. PR......you better wrap your damn knees!!

“If you are going to be a champion, you must be willing to pay a greater price.”

~Bud Wilkinson~

The Lab

I'm really starting to hate PR. I mean I think I am though its been so long since we've danced. I remember loving him; welcoming him every day and smiling when he was in the room. Butterflies filled the air as I looked at him and knew I would be calling him my own again someday. I hate him now. So many battles; so many defeats. Why is he so mean to me? Why does he have to be so damn stubborn headed. Go above my head PR, and stay there!

Another failed attempt! Ugh.....hate, hate, hate! You remind me of someone else I know.

My body aches. My heart aches. My training suffers because I am suffering. I think I've found a light though. Still very vague and dim in the distance, but a light nonetheless. I see it flickering, drawing me in like a moth to a flame. Flame! That's it. That's what I need to get out of this darkness. This headache. This nightmare. This never ending slump. A flame!

Yesterday was the beginning of that flame. I went to The Lab gym in St. Louis with my teammate and new awesome training partner, Kyle. We had a great session, one of the best ones I've had in months. Still no PR to be found but it awakened that demon inside me again. It felt nice! It reminded me of my first weightlifting home at CalStrength and I felt like I was training next to Donny Shankle again.

Smiles. Roars. Explosions. Lions filled the room. We were a stand still quiet amongst the storm. Nothing made sense in there except our training. Kyle hit a PR (so I know he lives there). I will find him again and we will dance, but until then I'll share him with everyone else in the room. Rugged little home, but it was broke in to the sound of bars slamming and decorated with chips and holes in the wall.... so I loved it. Bars rattled off of the hips around me, my teammate sat behind me to cheer me on, house music filled the air and somehow on my first visit I felt so at home. I needed that. Wow, what a great feeling to have after the shit I've had to deal with lately. It was a moment of peace where lately there is none. It was a flame and I brought the match. Keep burning fire. Keep me warm and alive on the inside cause lately I've felt so cold. Rekindle my love for PR and let me trust him again. Let me believe that I am invisible and heal my open battle wounds. Burn brighter and brighter so everyone else in my corner can have some too. You keep going and I'll keep dumping the gasoline on. Thank you Lab partner for taking me and can't wait to do it again! Next time.....I'll bring my dancing shoes!

To all the Daddy Bears in the world!!

I just want to say Happy Father's Day to all the wonderful Daddies out there, especially to mine who is always there for me and now more than ever my rock that I look up to and come to when I need a shoulder to cry on.

I love you Daddy!

Training!

Well I thought life would be a little less crazy as I left CalStrength and traveled across the country to new ventures. It hasn't though. I'm set on the idea that life is just crazy. Forest Gump was right, you really just never know what you're going to get. Of all the things going on in my life right now, one thing is still for sure....training is hard and I am loving it. Coach Ma is working every inch of my body with accessory work and I'm doing just as he asks. I feel a little more CrossFit lately as my body aches and hurts when I move, even more than the old aches and pains of before. I love it though, did I already mention that? The team, even though I haven't met all of them yet, is awesome! I like them a lot, even though they could never replace my first family at CS. I still find myself talking and thinking about them. Jon, Tom, Donny and all the others wondering how they're all doing and wishing we were all together dancing on platforms in the same room again. Change is good though, it makes us grow as people. Stronger on the bar and braver in real life. When you can adapt to change you can take on the World, and only Champions take on the World. I love my new home. I love being back in the arms of my family. I love watching my daughter run around playing in the water with her little cousin. I love the opportunity at my feet and I am taking it in full stride! I sometimes forget how strong I really am until life throws these moments of true strength right in my face. I'm ready though. I'm mad. I'm confident. And I'm determined. I'm Wonder Woman....remember!

Second Chances are Sometimes Worth the Wait

It is absolutely crazy to look at life and think we actually have it all figured out. I mean, what does it mean to plan anymore? Is there even such a thing? People plan to have a baby when they have the money saved up for it but is there ever enough money? People plan to finish school and become doctors without any rough spots or disappointments? People plan what they are going to do tomorrow and then their car blows up today? I planned for all of these things and nothing went as PLANNED.  But breaking the plan doesn't mean you've failed....it doesn't even mean that you have to quit trying. Success never came without a little failure and it sure never came to those to who gave up. I have said it before and I'll say it again, I am one of those believers that everything happens for a reason and I believe my reason is here. As  I've been mentioning in my blogs over the last little while, big things are happening in my life. I have decided to uproot myself from California and all I known for the last five years. I have decided to take what I've learned at CalStrength and put it further to work while I better my education. I have been offered the opportunity to lift on scholarship at Lindenwood University in St. Charles, MO under new supervision of Coach Jianping Ma and finish my education and I am taking it.

I am beyond excited for this opportunity and can't wait to see what comes next in this bigger plan. However, as one door opens I am sad as the other door closes. I truly loved my stay at California Strength and appreciate all the time that my Coach and basically founder Glenn Pendlay had to give me and I take away a knowledge that others would only dream to receive. The man took me in as a crazy CrossFitter and turned me into a crazy lifter. Out of the two, I'm not sure which is more sane? I am also grateful for the chance I had to lift with some of the best guys in the United States! On top of being wonderful athletes and lifters they were some of my best friends and comrades as well. I take a little from each of them on to my next step in this sport and I already can't wait till the day we all meet again! It will be a big family reunion that's for sure. I also thank Dave and Kathryn Spitz, Matt and Haley Johnson,  and Peter Bauman at CalStrength for giving me all the encouragement in the world while training in their facility and also a HUGE thank you to Muscle Driver USA for my sponsorship over the last year. Lastly, a thank you to my family for allowing me to leave and follow my dreams even if they are half way back across the country! These are such huge things in my life that even a thank you can't even begin to show my appreciation for.

It is such a sad thing to leave what you know in desire for something else but everyone knows life doesn't come easy. As a person you grow and feed off of these chances in life to change the world...or at least your own world! I take this opportunity head first and laugh at the thought that even though I still don't have it all PLANNED out I.WILL.NOT.FAIL. I will take this one day and one lift at a time. I will focus on what I have in front on me. I will make the NOW my very best EFFORT for TOMORROW! I am so so happy to be a Lindenwood Lion and I can't wait to see what's next for me. Stay tuned followers, because I'm about to even Wow myself!!

XOXOXOXOXOXO!!! Love you all!!!

Wonder Woman Lindsay Taylor

That little minion I spoke of yesterday....Marin Chew

Watering Young Seeds

How do you grow the sport of weightlifting? How do we make it more popular, more of a "cool" thing to do and be a part of? CrossFit turns Reebok and blows up. The world goes bonkers over 21, 15, 9 and falling to the ground bloody and the feeling of death. I DID. I started as a CrossFitter. A strong CrossFitter, hence began weightlifting. I loved CrossFit. Still do, and still respect it....from a distance, but now my love is found on the bar. It's a fine line between the argument of these two worlds. One would say CrossFit is being a well rounded best at everything. Ok.....well rounded, yes....but best, I'm not convinced? To be the best or the greatest you have to take your focal point and center it on something. Whether that be running, or gymnastics, or olympic lifting you have to be dedicated to that certain thing. Then, you have to slave in hours and hours and hours of work on just that. You want to be the best kipping pullup guy and you better believe you're going to be doing a hell of a lot of kipping pull ups.

Anyway, back on track here. Weightlifting. What do we do? How do we get our kids involved because they are the gateway to our future. My daughter goes to every local event around, sits and watches almost every practice I do, and cheers me on on every lift. SHE thinks it's cool. She think I'M cool! But how do we further that? I don't ever push her to want to lift but becuase of all the time she watches me put in she just naturally wants to do it too....maybe? She has a bar in which she does the lifts on her own. I add in a few coaching ques but am hesitant to "coach" her yet becuase right now it is just FUN to her. I want it to stay fun. Lord knows it's a twisted form of it once you get to this point. She makes lifts and smiles saying, "Look, I'm strong like my mommy!" It definitely encourages me to lift more! She does the snatch, clean and jerk, and when she's really wound up she combines the two in kind of a split snatch/jerk thingymajig! Either way, I like it because she's up and moving around.

I have another girl, Marin Chew, who in the same way watched me and started being intrigued. Her parents are friends of mine. Mom dabbled in some CrossFit for awhile but primarly is doing training for figure competitions and her dad trains Muy Thai. She came in to watch though when all our paths crossed. She's a tiny little thing who until recently was not one to really do the "sports" thing. After months of watching she, (cute, little bitty, young girl) Marin, wanted to lift big weights....LIKE MEEEE!!! I've been working with her now for about 3 months and the girl is an animal! And most of all...she LOVES it!! She has been saving up her money for the last few months  AND BOUGHT WEIGHTLIFTING SHOES WITH IT!! Her form is prestine! Her lifts are increasing every time she comes in. She's rocking leapord tights and tank tops!! She watches all my videos and reads my blogs! She knows everyone on my team from watching too much Youtube and you better believe she's stronger than all the little boys in her class!!!

So again, I ask...how do we make this sport more popular? It all starts right here with US! It starts with the Lindsay Taylors, Donny Shankles and Jon Norths. We are paving a road to all the younger people out there that WANT TO BE LIKE US! We have to stand strong as role models. We have to convince these little people that we are cool....AND WE ARE!?! We have to show them we are having fun and that hard work sure pays off! We get one little Marin through the door, and she goes and tells all her friends and they tell all their friends and soon we will rule the world!! RIGHT? Ahahahaha, well maybe not rule the world but hopefully we will grow this sport to a higher degree. What blows up fast comes down fast......long steady work holds strong. Hopefully we are the sport of the future? 

Team California Strength 2012

*missing from picture is Kevin Cornell, Robert Blackwell, and Tom Sroka

Wouldn't you like to lift like a girl???

Fight with PR

I sit in this dusty corner of the gym sipping my water, gathering myself before I go up to fight with PR. This fight seems to come few and far between here lately and I have been walking away defeated too many times. The pain getting here is sometimes a battle all on it's own. I feel so beat down on my fight up to the top. Even the lighter weights seem to uppercut me when I'm not looking. You have to be quick on your feet in this game. You have to know when to hit and have just the right spot to take him down. The floor seems to have less bounce than it did before, and the air around me is stagnant with left over chalk clouds that billow around me. The smell of sweat and tears fill the room like a must in a guys locker room after a football game. Everyone around me cheering, I think, cause I can see their lips moving but all I hear is my head telling me to pull the shit out of the bar. I hate this fight, but yet I love it. Everytime I get here I feel the bar raise a little more. Even if I don't win there's something good that always comes from it. I had one less failed attempt on my way this time. My positions are better, smoother, stronger. I am hungrier. I leave always wanting more. I know what I want, and I know what it's going to take to get me there. Lots and lots of these battles, like little stepping stones to the top of this temple I want to walk on. Everyone wants to be on top, but only special few have what it takes to get there.

Fail.

Get up.

Fail.

Get UP.

Fail.

Get. The. HELL. UP!

Do it again and again until your body can no longer be unsatisfied at what lies at your feet. Lift. Sit. Breathe. Lift again. Turn on this fight and bring out the heavy artillary. Then pack your bags for the reward at the end. Every day is a battle. If not PR today, then LIFE, or BILLS, or REAL WORLD? Get better everyday. Come everyday and most of all BRING IT everyday! Quit making lame excuses of why today is not YOUR day. You hurt? So do I. You're tired? I haven't slept yet!You're hungry? I'm always hungry! and it's that hunger that will get me through to the end. The end, where then and only then, I can sit, kick my feet up, and relax....looking down off my temple at the fight below me.

Crazy isn't here yet...

You haven't seen the best part yet. This isn't crazy...it's not even close. Everyday is a turning point though and if you're just tunning in, you're walking in on the best part. I'm just now making a stand and my legs feel strong. They're stonger than ever. I feel like I can throw boulders into the sky, or at least smiley faces to the back of your head. My blood is pumping, so hard now it makes me shake. I take a deep breath in and still yet it leaves me unsatisfied. I wan't to lift heavier bars and rip the heads off dragons. I want to take this aggression out on something!?! I want to scream and beat my chest as I jump out of the white forest and rip the faces off red headed bars! Throw on another plate, bring your friends green, yellow and blue. You better believe I won't give up without a fight. I've never been there before but today I feel dressed for battle. I have my army to pick me up if I should fall. They'll dust me off, slap my ass, and send me out for another round. Today, I'm feeling CrossFit and thinking AMRAP till collapse. This fuel inside me burns hot and so deep now there's no turning back. People are starting to see it on my face. They're starting to feel the heat as I walk by. Don't be scared my friends, it's just the life in me being brought to a boil. I lose more and more of it as it evaporates out of my body and on to the floor along with everyone else's hopes and dreams. These dragons fly around my gym barfing cupcakes instead of blowing flames. All it is in the end though is a bunch of smoke out your ass. I'm typing this in my weightlifting shoes. I'm not done. I've only just started. You haven't seen the best part yet. This isn't crazy....it's not even close.

The road less taken....

Sometimes as people we find it so much easier to follow a trail that has already been blazed by many others. One that has been mowed and properly taken care of. One that has two lanes due to all the traffic. We follow these roads just like we do when we drive our cars down the freeway. Some of us on cruise controll, some of us sightseeing, taking our time, and some of us while multitasking and talking to our friends in other states. We go through life like mindless robots. The three exits and road changes on our way to work turn into thoughtless right hand turns in which our car, like a 15 year old broke horse, just makes it's natural turn with out thinking or even preparing for it. We go about our lives like a program we are supposed to follow. Monday through Friday many of you are like zombies and then the weekend arrives and you come to life to get dolled up and dance in the clubs. Or for weightlifters, we show up to practice, one, sometimes two times a day and meet the same bar with the same weights that we have been putting up over our heads for the last two months now and decide that today we're just going to do it all over again. Why do we become robots? Why can't everyday be a PR or at least a good running attempt at one? Why do we forget to pay attention to all the exits in life and only focus on the one that gets us to work? Why do we forget to take the time to live off of standby mode? I want to bring something new to everyday of my life. I want to keep you guessing what I have in store for you next. I want to keep you tunning in on the edge of your seat and searching for the next big YouTube video. I want to hit PRs again. Life isn't a game that you get to save everynight and come back to when your friends are back around. It is an on going cycle in which you have to make the best of every chance you get in order to capture the flag at the end. What is it that you want? You want to be strong? You want to drop 30 pounds? You want to get your life together again? Then do it! Stop waiting for tomorrow. Stop cruising down the same road that has gotten you to work for the last 15 years but changed nothing. Stop shutting your mind off and making excuses for yourself. No one is going to do it for you. No one is going to drag you off the couch and litterally kick you in the ass. Well, not everyday anyway. Find what drives you, what fuels you and fill up and run like hell until you find what you're looking for or you accomplish what you've always wanted. Don't look back to see who's following this new path with you, just go. Those who see your courage and dedication will follow. You will start a new path and eventually add on more lanes. Don't be affraid to wander off on your own! If you get lost or scared along the way find someone who will dust you off and send you back out again. It is engrained in each and every one of you. Dig deep. You can do it.

"Each one of us has a fire in our heart about something. It's our goal in life to find it and keep it lit."
-Mary Lou Retton
Olympian

Are you still out there?

Sometimes I forget you're out there. Still watching, still admiring, still looking up to what it is I represent. Even when I'm in a slump I still inspire? Thank you for reminding me that I still have some kind of worth. Training sucks but you still tune in for more? I will try my hardest to kick this funk and come back harder, stronger, and more determined than ever, puking the brightest rainbow you've ever seen. You keep watching and I'll keep lifting. Day after day until this slup has been defeated and I walk out better on every end. Big changes are hapening in my life right now and I'm going to make the best of them. God makes people strong for a reason and he made me dumb strong as I've been told so I'm ready for this. Ready for all that comes my way. Ready for new ventures and new smiles. Ready to be inspired myself again. Ready to break 200! Keep watching guys....I promise I won't let you all down.

Easter with my kiddo!

A post by my dear friend Lori Fouts

Just a rant. The drive thru is NEVER an option. I think its funny, alot of these fast food places are sitting right in front of, or very near a grocery store. To me it is just as easy to stop, walk into the produce section, and pick up something quick, sliced turkey meat as well. This is kinda like our ancestors did, foraging when we are hungry, but we do it in the produce section.
Im just saying, if one plans ahead and we wont find ourselves in this situation. Also its not a bad thing to feel hunger every now and then. This called intermittent fasting, and this is a good thing. The need it now mentality has to change. Patience and observation is a good thing, and should be practiced daily. We tend to go through life on auto pilot, not mindful of any of our own actions. Today I challenge you to stop, listen to your breath, observe yourself, be patient, and experience life in the moment, mindful of your present moment in time. Can you do this? Re-post and share your experiences with me!



So true!! Thank you LORI!! xoxo

Tape on T-shirts makes me smile

A fire burns deeply inside me. One that makes me feel like an unstoppable freight train barreling through obstacles nonetheless but not showing any signs of slowing or even stopping. My fire gets brighter everytime it gets blown on. You can't blow me out, I feed off of your oxygen. My belly warms as I pull on bars heavier than I knowing that the weight of these steal rods is heavier than whatever life throws at me. Weight shmate, watch me put it over my head and slam it down to the ground. Better yet, watch me as I do doubles with it and laugh. Off today, on like donkey kong tomorrow. As I get frustrated with things I take it out on the bar. Kick it, swear at it, slam it. I feel that fire get brighter. Hotter. It's a blue flame fire made of toxic chemicals that make your eyes water when you stare at it. It screams a confident "hell yeah" when I prove to you and more importantly myself that when I get kicked I don't stay down. I don't need your "helping" hand to pull me off the floor. Keep it, you're going to need to work on your grip for the next round. I lift weights. I make my daughter laugh. Tape on T-shirts makes me smile. Crazy people lift weights to stay sane. I'm just trying to find the middle of it all. Or maybe lifting this way means we're crazy? This blog is starting to sound a little Jon North? I miss Donny. That crazy guy was what kept us all sane I think....or maybe he just made us feel more that way compared to him? Big things are about to happen in my life I know it. I bought a lottery ticket for the first time in probably 5 years and I won A TICKET.....that's gotta be a sign right!? That surely means 90-110 is in my future. I hit a PR off the blocks today, which has been about like finding a four leaf clover in a dessert lately. They usually travel in heards though (just like Pete Bauman's turkeys) so whenever there's one there should be more to follow. I will DEFINITELY keep you posted. As for tonight, thanks for the outrage moment of venting....I feel much better now. Tune in on live feed Friday to watch me win some money.

Happy Birthday Aunt Bev!!

In Memory of Jim Davis

No words can express the loss of such a great man. Jim Davis was such a joy to be around. From the smile on his face to the positivity that he possessed, he touched people's lives and made them better just by the opportunity to know him. Even though he is in a better place now, he will be greatly missed in this one. Thank you Jim for all the moments of laughter and uplifting talks. Thoughts and prayers go out to his wife, kids, family, and friends. Rest in peace Jim, you will never be forgotten.

Jim Davis (March 27, 2012)

Ready for the Rain to let up...

The last few weeks have been total chaos it feels like. The static in my head bounces around between my ears like a pin ball machine. Jayden. Stay over the bar. Wrecked Car. Ahhhhhhh. Heals Lindsay. Smile....Jayden. LIFE. Oh, life.... I haven't been writing lately because I'm afraid of my fingers taking over the keyboard like lifeless zombies and terrorizing this positive blog site I've worked so hard on creating. I have been telling myself for the last couple days to get on here and write something...even a lousy pass for a post of just telling you our livestream has been changed to 1:00 instead of 2:00, anything just to let you know this blog is still up and running. Still nothing. I can't even think of things to talk about and usually I can't decide out of the 10 ideas I have which one to continue on with. Then yesterday it hit me. I was laughing and smiling. I was at softball practice. I was coaching. Coaching is one thing that no matter how terrible of a day it has been I can just let it all go and work with the kids. This is my second season as St. Mary's Softball coach, and it continues to fill my life with joy every time I step foot out there on that dirt.

It's been raining a lot and our practices and games have been canceled more than played lately but yesterday we were determined to get out there even if it was still muddy and wet. I would say it was one of our best practices. We didn't hit a lot and we didn't field a lot, but we did learn a lot....and had a lot of fun. I didn't look at my watch one time throughout practice and by the time I had we had ran over ending time by almost 30 minutes! The girls were filthy! White pants were covered in mud and grass stains! There was dirt in their hair, mud all over their arms and clothes, and we even ran around with no shoes on but didn't mind taking socks off! I'm sure parents were cussing me when their children walked in last night looking like bums off the street and reeking of mother natures not so finer moments.

Long story short, I left there last night smiling, something that I haven't done a lot of lately. My girls cheered me up more than they will ever know and didn't really do anything except play and have fun! I walked away from the fields watching kids get in their parent's car while they cringed and laid down newspapers. Not sure why but it made me kind of warm inside. Our kids are only young once, they only have a short time of very limited responsibilities before they are thrown in adulthood and expected to just start flying on their own. Have fun. Cherish these moments. Soak them up because there will be a day when they won't have time for that let alone you. I took my four year old with me to practice yesterday. she played in the mud and came home with grass stains too....I too was one of those parents who started to cringe as I put her in the car. Quickly I brushed her off, smiled, gave her a kiss, told her great practice and then went on to strap her filthy butt in her car seat and off to frozen yogurt we went.

Sometimes even when it feels like life is raining down on you a small glimpse of sunshine will appear where a beautiful rainbow will sprout and make your day. Look for those moments. Those are the ones that get you through the rain.

Thank you St. Mary's Softball girls for yesterday's rainbow!
xoxoxox Coach!

Snatched by the Snatchasaurusrex!

No it's not CrossFit, it's not diet, it's not even lack of sleep.....the Snatchasaurusrex is in town and he's out on a snatch catching frenzy! That's the only thing I can think of. Any other excuse would just be insane and childish. To make believe and imagine something so crazy as just being in a snatch slump would be so far fetched that I'm sure my nose would start to grow. It is definitely the Snatchasaurusrex, I saw him with my own two eyes! He's silver with hard, cold, almost knurling like scales with colorful wings on each side! The more colors he posses the stronger his powers! He comes into your gym and rips hips apart, tearing into your mind and crawling into your head making a nest to live in while he whispers in your ear. He adds invisible weight to your bar when you're not looking and insists on making warm up weights feel unbearable! He breathes a chalk like smoke that billows across the room infecting other teammates close by. Snatchasaurusrex growls a crash bang failed attempt gosh dang it son of a monkey mothers yell! Words that don't make sense unless he's around.  He pulls your bar out front and sets fire to your heals so you're forced to only go to your toes! He flies out of your head only to circle the room and knock you back on your ass.  

I'm done! I'm tired of this Snatchasaurusrex hanging out at CalStrength, more specifically my platform, my head, my body! Time to battle! Strap up your Pendlays with me, grab your Nexgen spear, let's hunt this beast! Do not sleep, do not eat, do not be satisfied till we have his head on a Werk San platter!  We will prevail! We will come out victorious! We will again snatch! Let's kill him and use his smoke to refill our chalk dishes while WE laugh! We'll hang his broken body out in front of CalStrength's door to warn his friends Missedcleanasaurus and Cantjerkadactyl to stay out! We will stand strong in our singlets of armor and live to fight again. They will someday come back....they never give up! But as long as my heart continues to beat I won't give up either! Your fight makes me stronger! Every battle I win with Snatchasaurusrex and his buddies makes my hands more calloused over and my heals sturdier! Join me team! Today, at 1:00 we kill! 

Journey to Dreamland

What is it that fuels us when we've run out of gas? That burning sensation from way down within us that almost feels like an erupting volcano about to take way. Is it our dreams, our greatest desires, or is it fear? Fear of letting others down, the fear of failure. Or maybe a lethal combination of it all.

Whatever it is, it's a fossil fuel like no other. It burns so deep and so hot that we will follow it anywhere it drags us so that we too can stay warm. We will close our eyes and jump in any direction it's pulling not even thinking or planning of what may come next. That's the beauty of dreams. They are the one thing that you can't make any hesitations with while they last because once you wake up chances are you will never relive it again.

Positively weigh yourself and how far you've come. If you're dancing on a dream and starting to struggle, always remember to never lose sight of that 8 year old little boy and what he played for. Don't forget how many hours you've put in time and time again with a sore and battered body. Waking up for breakfast on a back roller so that you can train through your lunch and go home and nap. You've worked so hard to become the best.

You've given up friends nights out and unsupportive people. Friendships and  relationships have come and gone because they don't know the life of an athlete. The life of true dedication. The life of battery, stiffness, aches, pains, and athletic tape. They don't get you. Your family stay by your side because they believe in you. They have to. They've seen your ups and downs and know that's what it is that makes a true champion. The people who love you and support you will be waiting for you at the end of that dream rainbow cheering you on while  you collect your pot of gold.

Whether your rainbow will take you near or far, it will be beautiful. It will be great. It will be worry free and happy because it leads you to the land of dreams. Where snozberries really taste like snozberries and biofreeze rivers run rapid. Dreamland has no perception of pain. When you fight that bully no matter how hard you hit him it feels like a plate of jello on the other end. You will be pain free, running high off adrenaline, and rocking a steady smile of pure focused energy.

Positive! That's the key to success. Positive through and through. Mentally able and physically your body will pull through. Believe in yourself, I know I believe in you! Take that fear, that pain, that stupid voice in your head and fuel your passion with it. Sacrifice them to the dream gods so that you can dance through the clouds on tiptoes with the one who makes you smile. Follow that burning sensation in your heart. Fear not of failure but embrace the small falls that will only make you stronger. You will not be the best at everything but that's what keeps us wanting more. Keeps us alive and fighting. Keeps us coming back with more fight. Show this and you will show true greatness. You will show the heart of a champion.

Bodies need to be rebuilt from time to time, knees need a little extra stitch in them once in awhile, but hearts......hearts, once they stop pumping, stop billowing up that deep volcanic lava, once they give up and let the negative darkness in; well, they cannot be restarted. Don't lose your heart. Don't forget that inner child. Don't forget your dad's coaching and your mom's team snacks. Don't forget hotdogs after every win. Don't forget why you started and how much fun you've had along the way. You can do this. This is just one more day of training to a champion. One more day closer to a life in Dreamland. One more step closer to happiness. I'll meet you at the end of the rainbow, in Dreamland.....with a snozberry smile!

In the words of Ahhhhhhnold, "I'll be back!"

I sit here trying to rationalize what just happened in my head. My ears are still ringing from the explosion of the clapping that once was before I walked out there. Silence now. Or maybe I'm still sitting here in shock. The remains of my bar and the weight that used to feel so light still lay unbruised up on that stage, smoking from the fire and heat of all the lights.  I can't feel my arms or legs but I think they're alright. I think I remember walking away but I'm unsure of everything else that just happened. The village of people are still there, watching from a distance just outside the fire line. I think they're ok too, but I can't bring myself to check on them for fear that catching their eyes will start another explosion. My heart is pounding, that's how I know I'm still alive. How much longer it can handle this rhythm is unknown by me but for now it's ok. Kick. Scream. Cry. Is like my stop, drop, and roll. My motives for finding safety. I think I'm still breathing. Still can't hear anything besides those awful voices in my head. Visions replaying in my mind like a bad dream but I'm very much awake.  Pacing. I want to scream so bad but I'm scared as to what might come out of I do. My stomach is tossing and turning like a blow up raft caught in a tsunami. Wake up Lindsay! This can't be real. This didn't just happen. I didn't fly across the country to get hit like this. The one I loved so dearly just turned it's back on me. Thats what I get for falling head over heels so quickly for. Stupid snatch.

Heart pounding. A different kind now than what it was 5 minutes ago....or maybe it's been 15 or 30 by now. Time for some reason feels like it's a broken record playing over and over the last 2 minutes of my life.

Pause.

The fear is gone, I have nothing now to lose. I AM PISSED. The first words of English that finally rolled up to my tongue after the last 5 minutes of what I'm sure sounded like a sailor with terretts seemed to turned my coach's face in to a look of appreciation. (deep breath) "Well.....let's go clean and jerk." Finally, I was starting to make sense. I was snapping out of it. I could hear again. Still people out there clapping. They're alright. I'm alright. We walk back into the warm up room, I'm still looking down. Avoiding eye contact with anything and everyone. I just gift wrapped a national medal and dropped it in the homeless guy's tin cup sitting outside the CrossFit gym.  Damn it. If only I could clean and jerk 200kg. I've had my iPhone for so long that now I'm shaking my head to change the song of voices in my mind. Here we go again. Just hit a stinking opener! Shoot, open with the bar and then throw 100 on there. You can't go up there and do this again. Get hit twice on the same stage in the same day? I hope to God the tracking system is off on this next bomb and lands somewhere over in the powerlifting section. Here I am again. Up on that stage. Looking at all the people, standing room only, they haven't left. First lift..... good! A sign of relief. A slight feeling of happiness. Three white lights assures me the judges all made it through that awful first bombing. Clapping. Jerk two, fail! Damn these heavy bars and the horse they rode in on. I can't breathe again. I bump up after a gruesome missed lift. Higher? More weight? You bomb your snatch and now you want to go 1 for 3 in the clean and jerk? You're jumping out if this plane with no shoot on. Silence! You will make this. You HAVE TO MAKE THIS! If not you're walking back to California because you sure don't deserve to waste anymore of CalStrength's money. That last clean may has well have been 200kg because it took every last bit of energy I had to stand up with it. Stars and flickers in my eyes, not from the flash of cameras but from the lack of oxygen making it's way up to my brain. Dip an drive. That's it. That's all I have to do now and I can go home and cry alone in my shower.

JERK!

Hot damn, I did it. I hate the jerk but today I made him my boyfriend! That clean felt so terrible and the jerk like warm butter. 2 Kg competition PR. Maybe there's light at the end of this tunnel after all. I gave away two medals but I guess I'll keep one to remind me of this awful trip. I'll hang it at the other side of the gym because it feels so tainted around my neck. It's like a shrapnel scar from the wreckage of the bomb. I'm alive though. Unhurt physically and mentally stronger. My pride will heal. Scar tissue will cover up this feeling in my heart like the armor of batman. Stronger. STRONGER! I am, indeed, somehow stronger! I have had my first test. A test of failure in which I completed the bonus section and passed with a C-, barely getting by but graduating my first Nationals. I will study harder, push more weight, pull longer hours, make love with my new Jerk boyfriend. I will be O.K. Everybody gets hit from time to time, I just prove to be an overachiever again by doing it at the biggest event of my career thus far. That's ok. That tainted medal will hang in my vision point to remind me to never give up. I'll take a million days of hurting trying to get better over that hurt I just endured. As a matter of fact, training may never hurt again.

I will be back!

Thank you to everyone who watched, everyone who emailed, text messaged, words of encouragement, embracing thoughts, uplifting stories. You all motivate me, inspire me, and keep me wanting to keep coming back. I only hope that I do the same for you....
I'm signing off for now, my plane is about to land. Tomorrow, you'll be able to find me back in our CalStrength corner.... snatching.

2012 National Championships

Six months of training, seven competitions, hundreds of hours of sweat, pain, and tears and it has finally boiled down to this moment. This one opportunity for all the best weightlifters in America to gather under one roof to dominate one platform to prove who is the best lifter in the Nation.

There is nothing left to do now except wait. The taper bug is gone, I've settled into my light week of training and I'm ready to walk up on that stage with strong legs and an open heart. I'm telling myself my body feels great, refreshed, rejuvenated, ready for war.

My blood is pumping still from a wonderful week and I'm packing it in my carry-on to Ohio! I take with me the thought of winning. I take the heart of a champion. I take the confidence from all my friends, family, and followers of knowing I can do it, even when that last minute doubt starts to roll in. I take with me the fight and fearlessness of Donny Shankle. I take with me a smile of happy, happy thoughts.

With all this you can consider me dangerous. Locked and loaded and ready for all that comes my way. I am a CalStrength Soldier, no longer a rookie. I have a bronze medal from American Opens after 3 months of training and it was like the first taste of blood to the wolf. I want more. I'll always want more. And until I'm broken down beyond repair I'll fight harder, train longer, never complain, and wear a dangerous smile on my face with my eyes on one prize: to become the BEST. I am the underdog, I am the one with absolutely the least amount of training. I am 6 months; they are 6 years. I am dressed for sucess in new CalStrength swag and I have nothing to lose. I am Wonder Woman and I am ready.

See you Sunday.....

Rolling with the Punches

It's amazing how unplanned life is at any given moment. You may think you know what's going on or that you have your life's blueprints in hand, step by step; the crazy thing is what happens when you're not looking, when you're not planning on it. Weightlifting, for example, is something I never planned on happening in my life. I was very set and happy with my CrossFit training when weightlifting was introduced to me. I didn't know what was behind that door that day, and I didn't know what it had in store for me. Six months have passed now and I can't say that I would take any of it back. I am so happy with my training and enjoying every minute of it. It has introduced me to many new friends across the country and the world. People who unite under one common interest and compete to take it all home. It has introduced me to the greatest of teammates, a wonderful coach, and a whole new love for competing again.

Don't stress in life when you feel like it's not going your way. Focus on the controllables, focus on what you can make a difference on. When life throws you a curve ball, set back, wait on it, and drive it into right field. Don't hold back in life. Don't regret. You never know what would happen if you had to go back in time and do it all over again. Catch what life throws at you and run with it. It's the unexpected of life's surprises that most times end up the best. Set your goals high and do what it takes to get there, enjoying every road bump, obstacle, wonderful delight that comes along with it. Don't be afraid to swim out past the safety nets and take a risk from time to time. You never know when that next big risk just might just be your next big adventure.

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else; and for everything you gain, you lose something else. It is about your outlook towards life."

Broadcasting Live Today at CalStrength

California Strength will be streaming live today as we prepare for Nationals. Click HERE to be apart of the fun.....sign in and chat to the right of the stream and give me a shout out!! See you there!

2:00 pm Pacific Time!

"Winners, I am convinced, imagine their dreams first. They want it with all their heart and expect it to come true. There is, I believe, no other way to live."

-Joe Montana

God's Thumbnail

For the first time in a long time I sat outside this evening and just stared in to the night sky. The moon was particularly beautiful tonight and from where I was sitting it was surrounded by a beautiful frame of tree branches with another bright star caught in there as well. It was a moment to clear my head, to take a break from my ongoing busy day, yet staring at something seemingly so simple and beautiful caused a rush of different thoughts and emotions to burst in to my head.

It made me think of my Grandpa Hewkin and how he always called these crescent type moons "God's thumbnail". It made me think of all our happy times together, even when most of the time he just liked to pick and aggravate for fun to watch us get so wound up. It made me think of collecting peacock feathers out of his yard and sticking them in our hair as we play Indians and dance around the house.

It made me think of my dad, and all the nights we spent out on our huge sundeck staring at stars through the telescope, about finding the different constellations, about knowing how to read the stars if you were ever lost out in the wilderness someday. It made me think of fall time back home in Missouri, with a cool breeze just right for the sweatshirt and tights I was wearing. It made me think of bonfires and family, rain on a tin roof. It made me think of all the friends I still have back there.

It made me think... "I need to do this more often."

There's never enough time in the day and if you're not careful you will let all life's finer moments pass you up. Take a minute every once in a while to slow things down and enjoy a little break. Life is hectic, weightlifting is hectic, work is hectic, and when all that comes crashing down on you sometimes all you need is a little fresh air and second to rest your head. I have a huge week ahead of me this week and this picturesque moment of good memories, great air, and the best of company couldn't have came at a more perfect time.

Life happens quick, one minute we are in our youth and the next we have children of our own. Keep your challenges and goals in life coming but don't be afraid to hit the pause button every once in awhile. Take a second to kick back for a deep breath of fresh air. It's refueling to the body, the soul, and the mind. It's a potion for new PRs! It's sometimes just what you need. I know I did.....Nationals, I'll see you in ONE WEEK!

I HATE YOU LESS!!

As I have been doing my practices lately I have come to the conclusion that I just don't enjoy clean and jerks as much as I do the snatch. The funny thing is is when I started 6 months ago I loved cleans. I actually looked forward to the "WODs" that had them in it in CrossFit just because I knew I did them so well. Thing is I never jerked after the clean in CrossFit, or at least split jerked. Maybe I should go back and clarify....I hate the JERK! I am almost certain, and have said this in practice many of times, I would rather snatch 85 for a double than clean & jerk it once! I also make jokes that I will hit my first 200kg total with a 100kg snatch, 100kg clean & jerk....sometimes it really seems I'm not joking!

Here's the thing. I love to snatch. I rip through them in practice and even when it's a crumby day where I don't hit PRs or maybe fall short of hitting a regular number I still enjoy them. I dread the clean & jerk! I slow my pace in practice hoping to just make large enough jumps that the missed work will still somehow find its way above my head. I don't do this on purpose, I just dread them so much they mentally hurt! And like I said in my last blog post, the mind is a crazy, crazy thing. When mentally you're not ready for something how can your body ever be prepared for it.

So with all that being said here is my pledge to myself, my mind, and the people out there wishing me well......I am going to just start hating them less! That's got to be the answer right? I'm not saying I'm going to love them, I just don't want to hate them anymore. I will embrace the jerk, think nice thoughts about him, invite him in with locked out arms! Maybe eventually we will learn to work together in rhythm as one? I don't want to fight with him anymore. My body is so tired after practice that mentally I can't stand the thought of dreading to finish.

Quiet the demons in my head, don't answer them. You will get through this Lindsay. Bring on 100, bring on 105, and if you're ready attempt 110! Don't fear it, don't hate it, don't push it aside and take the shorter road! You can do this, just hate it less! Walk up to the bar thinking you'll give it your best shot instead of thinking "ah, this is going to suck," Surely enough of this attitude and perception of the lift will eventually just make practices run smoother and eventually end up being more gratifying me for me in the end.

If there's anything out there that's bothering you right now whether it be jerks, today's open WOD of freakinggggg burpees, form/ technique, or even your in laws....join me in just HATING IT LESS! Maybe it will work, maybe not...but in the long run I bet we save more brain cells by doing so and increase our overall enjoyment of life!

 What is it that you are going to "Hate Less"?

This is me clean and jerking 97kg. (213lb.) then lowering it down for a second jerk.

You may say that I'm a dreamer

What is it that is taking place during that moment that you're not talking but not really thinking about anything either? The moment where you're just kinda zoned out in space but still tense, clinching your teeth together. The one where someone asks, "What are you thinking about?" because you obviously look so focused and then you snap out of your piercing stare to curiously wonder what it even was yourself ? Is there a moment the mind ever turns off? A moment of pure rest? A standby mode where everything can just turn into a blinking blue light and take a break?

For me I wonder what goes on during those moments of blank stares. Sometimes I think there is just too much happening in my head to rationalize just one thought, or even keep up with it for that matter. I am constantly dreaming. Going over numbers and scenarios in my head. Visualizations that make me smile out of the blue even when no one's watching. I sit in front of a loaded bar listening to the beat of music in my own head, closing my eyes and attempting lift after lift in perfect rhythm and form, envisualizing perfection.

Such grace and beauty, the mind. It is a powerful thing. It is hub that everything must first begin. It is sometimes what makes or misses a lift before you even attempt it. For that matter, it is sometimes what causes you to ever walk that plank of even pursuing anything that might be categorized as impossible or unreachable in the first place. "You're dreaming," they say. Well I don't know about you but dreams are what keep me alive. They are my daily challenge to do something great.

My friend, Clint McPeek, said to me the other day, "When you stop dreaming is when they say you truly go insane". Eyes closed or eyes open, I think he's right. If you stop believing in yourself, stop challenging your own body, stop dreaming of the fight then who are you? What, during that time, defines who you are and where you want to be tomorrow? Dreams are merely aspirations that are just enough out of reach that you have to do something a little miraculous to achieve them, you have to do something big....something wonder woman.

Start first with yourself. Get right in your own head. Believe 100% that you are the best and you were brought here for this reason. If you dont believe in yourself, than who will? That bar is not your enemy. Neither is that tentative start total list, that crowd favorite, or that damn jerk....but rather your own mind. They've infiltrated home territory, they've got in to your head. Don't let them steal your dreams. Not first without a fight. Stand strong, walk proud, and never give in. Close your eyes and see it all over again, clearer and clearer, louder and louder each time and before you know it, when your eyes open, there you will be awake, alive, heart pounding in your own dream ready to take on the World....with eyes wide open!

A tribute to my teammate, Donny Shankle

Go Be Unforgettable
    by Lindsay Taylor

Day by day, rep by rep
You work to get stronger.

Slaving in hours
Like a forsaken monger.

Pushing and Pulling
On bars so fast

All the while
Still collecting your cash.

Show these young pups
You're not planning to stop

As you lower their PR's
Down from the top.

Deep breath and one more drive
 Explosive through the heels 

There goes another jerk
It's almost like sex appeal.

Hard Work and Determination,
Your other middle names

Never giving up,
Pushing hard through the game

You are King of this jungle,
The Shankle Almighty

Your rule of the World
Will be precise and timely....

Now tighten your Pendlays,

Kiss your Grandpa's chain

Today your goin' on like a gangsta'

Gonna make red kilos rain!

You've done it before,

A million times in your head.

Now open your eyes

And slam down your heal tread.

"You'll already be remembered,"

I've said it before.....

"Now go be unforgettable"

As you walk proud across that floor.

Dear Readers,
Seems like this is the year of the Shankle. People from all around the world, whether they know him or not have started to come together to do what it takes to get this man to the top. He is a leader. He has proven to be able to do things that until now have never been believed could be done. I just wanted to take this time to not only cheer my teammate on as he pushes forward in pursuing his hopes and dreams of this year's Olympics, but also take a minute to thank everyone else who has helped him along the way. Everything you do, big or small, verbally or monitarily has helped him better himself and his lifts and I see it everyday first hand. I know he would be in aggreance when I say Thank You is never enough. Now, let's start a Shankledemic and all join in to wish him well. You can never have too much good health, strength, or confidence in life. Comment below if there is something you'd like to say to Donny Shankle or find him personally on his blog and drop him a line. And again, Thank You, Thank You, Thank You for all your love and support.

xoxoxox,
Lindsay Taylor
   Wonder Woman!

US Cryotherapy....who said it's not cold in California

Today my teammate Tom Sroka and I got the special opportunity to visit USCryotherapy in Roseville, CA. We have both been dealing with some issues as far as aches and pains go and even just overall recovery lately and really need to "nip this in the bud" before Nationals. The good thing about hurting while you're under the care of Glenn Pendlay is.....he takes care of you....and QUICK.

Tom and I, unknown to what we were getting ourselves into assumed for the worst. We packed for Anartica and even planned our coffee stop for as soon as we were done. All we knew going in to it was this room was -200 degrees farenheit.....yes that is a NEGATIVE sign, not a typepo, and that we were signing up to step in. We kept our peptalks short before our pluge and knew that we were going into it together and no matter what we were coming out together!

Prep:

Short shorts....Tom wore chonies

Sports Bra......Tom oppted not to wear one of these

Long Socks (90's style with the scrunch)

Slippers (The world is always better with a slip on comfort foot warmer)

Two sweat bands to cover the ears....NOT FOR SWEAT

Sars Mask......hopefully NOT for Sars

and MITTONS....big enough for wiggle room

Now, I can't speak for Tom on this but I know personally I have grown to appreciate ice baths. Obviously not for the enjoyment of the cold but rather for the benefits they give and I swear they make me more energetic....however, appreciating something is not loving them, in fact I still dread every ice bath I take. The moment right before we walked into this chamber of hell froze over that sense of dread started to take over. Moment I knew it was going to be better was when Aaron (awesome cryo staff man) says....."anyone have any music they want me to put on, you can dance in there!" YES......this is about to be a good time! We strapped in some top seceret CalStrength black market PR music, closed our eyes, took a deep breath, and made our first step into the fray! Three and a half minutes went surprisingly fast probably because of our awesome dance moves. As soon as we steped out and started our "warming up" cardio I instantly, and I litterally mean INSTANTLY felt better! After the chamber we both did a localized treatment, went and ate, and then repeated the process. As far as I can tell I feel great. My elbows, which have been my problem area for awhile now feel great as of this second and I just finished my training for the night. I still feel energized and overall mobility feels really good. If I were to judge this theraputic modality of recovery I would without a doubt give it two thumbs up! I love it! I am already planning my next trip and I am yelling it to the world....well all of you, my readers at least. If you're anywhere close to this area you should check this place out! I promise the staff is great, they will take extra special care of you, and you will feel better once you're done! I know I do!!

USCryotherapy

Faster Recovery-Better Health

 

Cold air therapy is being widely used in Europe, Russia, and other parts of the world in peak performance training, recovery from sports related injury, and general wellness. the US Cryotherapy products, the most revolutionary advancements in cold therapy technology, generate extremely cold air up to 4 times colder than standard ice packs or baths, without lowering the body's core temperature. Treatment exposure last for up to 3 minutes (walking in our four person chamber)

Benefits:

-Faster Muscle Recovery

-Effective Pain Management

-Feel More Energetic

-Enhanced Well-Being

-Improve Sleep Pattern

-Promote Healthy Complexion

For more information check out their website at www.uscryotherapy.com

And if you go, tell them this really cool weightlifter chick named Lindsay sent you!!

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."
-Thomas Edison

A Weightlifter's Love Letter....

Dear Love,
When I see you my heart starts to race. My head instantly goes places of a brighter future together. One where we can dance off into the distance happy of all we've achieved. Pitter patter, pitter patter my heart hits hard against my chest. Sometimes I'm not sure if it's a good thing or if its a heartattack about to happen but it warms me. You give me butterflies everytime I put my hands on you, just like the very first time we met in that dark forbidden corner. Every day is a new day, and I have to win you over time and time again. Sometimes you play so hard to get, forcing me to my toes but deep down inside I know I have to try to stay back. Your heavy weight is sometimes such a burden, but it draws me back always begging for more.  You leave me happy yet always unsasified. Always wondering what's next for us, what bigger plans you have in store for our lives together. I lay in bed at night still thinking about you, about our next time together, whether it will be joyous or a fight. And yet I long for our fights. They make me stronger, they make my heart want more, and they make my legs fall out from underneath me. Still I come back. Give me more. Bring on the fight, bring on the challenge, bring on the pain. I'm in this till the end. Nothing you do to me is going to push me away, and no matter what I'll still fall in love with you over and over again. It's a journey, and no body said it was going to be easy. Push me and I'll pull you. Work with me and together we can be the best. Let no compromise be made, there is one goal in our relationship and once we get there we can smile together looking off into the distance over a nice glass of wine. Our future is bright, it is promising, it is our destiny together. You are strong and together we are unstoppable. Thank you for being a part of my life, for reheating my blood, for giving me back my drive and ambition. I was so lost without you and for that I am eternally grateful. Let us grow old together and always remember how far we've come. Now that I have you I couldn't imagine life without you.

Oh, bar, I will see you tonight where we will dance once again.

xoxo

   -Your Wonder Woman

I am the wrecker of steal...

“Why am I not in bed, like everyone else, dead to the world? Why do I do this, live with the constant pain, the suffering, the sacrifice? Why? Because I can. Because pain tells me I’m awake. Reminds me I’m alive. Who am I? I am the wrecker of steel. I am the crusher of mediocrity. I am the face of destiny. I am Animal...”

Broadcasting Live Today at CalStrength

Well guys it's Friday, and if you follow Cal Strength weightlifting at all you'll know that today is MONEY DAY! If you would like to partake in this event you can log on by clicking this LINK at 2:00pm Pacific Time. Also, sign on to the side and chat with Coach Pendlay! Give a shout out to me if you want!! wink wink! hope to see you all there!

Some days it just "Is what it is"

I hate those days you wake up and your hair won't do what it's supposed to do, like it has a mind of your own. Or the ones where you try on 15 different outfits and still can't come up with something that looks just right. Or even the ones where you start your day an hour early to run your errands and still manage to hit 1.5 hour stand still traffic. It's like it's destin to happen from time to time, kinda like that song I used to listen to when I was a kid, "Ironic," by Atlanis Morissette. Those days are going to come. Those days are going to test you.

Days like these in the weightlifting world will test you more than anyother. They are the days that warm up weights feel heavy. When you can't for some reason hit the bar in the right place on your hips.....or even hit your hips at all for that matter. They are the days that you catch everything forward but still somehow manage to fall backwards to your platform. These days test your character, they test your heart, they test your champion bloodflow. These are the days that make you stronger than ever both mentally and physically. These are the days that make good days SO worth the pain. 

These days downright suck, but somehow you manage to make it through. And the best part is.......after you pull that bar for the last time in that aweful practice, hit a weight that is still 20 kilos lower than your best but manage to make it look  pretty good compared to all the rest, you somehow find a smile. It's a smile that first starts in your belly, warming you up from the inside knowing that somehow you're going to live to see another day. It takes a warming sensation into your arms and legs letting them know that you're thankful for them sticking in it with you, and now they can rest.....knowing hopefully we won't have another one like that for a little while. Finally, your smile makes it up to your face.....radiating out with more glow than just any other normal day smile because damn it that sucked, and it's over, and you're somehow better than you were before it started even if it doesn't feel like it. It's a smile that you earned! 

It's a love, hate relationship on days like this......or maybe you just hate to love them? I don't know, but what I do know is this.......Champions fall from time to time, cowboys get bucked off their horse, Donald Trump has hit rock bottom, and being a true champion results in what you do when you're down there. What you do before the win, what you do when you're hurt, what you do when you're not ranked #1 and you so badly want to be. Champions are a breed so different from all the others. Sleep is different, work is different, training is different, and love is different. Be a champion, make life hurt, and get the hell up when you fall. You will survive this terrible day and tomorrow will be brighter because of it. Take these days to get strong because these are the ones where everyone else quits. I won't quit. Never. It's not in my blood. I will welcome these days and then hit them in the butt with the door when they leave. Come join me in being a champion.